Co-sleeping, a personal story
When I was pregnant, we knew that we had some fairly fixed ideas about how we wanted to raise our child, including allowing her to share our bed for as long as she wanted to. We have been shocked and sometimes upset at other people's reaction to what seemed to be a very instinctive decision, to sleep with our daughter. I am often made to justify this decision and made to feel as if we are "bad" parents just because we hadn't trained her to sleep in a cot in her own room by 8 weeks old. As it happens, we didn't even really talk about it, it just seemed the right and natural thing to do and offered some major advantages. Our daughter loved the constant contact and it made it so much easier to breastfeed during the night. By simply rolling over and letting her feed before either of us were fully awake, we were both able to drift back to sleep much quicker than if I had had to get up to feed, so everyone got extra sleep. Many studies have shown that co-sleeping helps to establish breastfeeding and leads to a more settled and happy baby. Others claim that these benefits can last for years and that children who slept with their parents do better at school, have higher self-esteem, fewer health issues and is more likely to be well adjusted than their peers. We know this goes against many bestselling books on parenting, such as Gina Ford and Richard Ferber but we are convinced that this was the right decision for us and for our daughter. Personally, I believe that night time should be about nurturing and closeness, not about training for the realities of later life. Yes, there can be some downsides to co-sleeping, but most can be overcome with a few adjustments, such as buying a bigger bed. There have been many reported studies into the dangers of co-sleeping, the most recent published early this year in the Lancet. La Leche League, amongst others, claim that they are flawed as they do not distinguish between safe (following current guidelines re temperature, soft bedding etc) and unsafe (eg on a sofa or with parents who smoke or drink alcohol) co-sleeping. Our daughter is very independent already (at 13 months) and I am convinced that this is due to all the extra nurturing and contact that she receives during the nights. At some stage, she will decide that she wants her own bed and she will be welcome to it. But in the meantime all three of us love the extra time we get together and there is nothing more wonderful than being woken by a kiss from your baby and seeing just how happy they are to be so close to you. I know that in this way we have created many special moments that we all treasure. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- What ever you personally decide, do make sure you follow the latest advice re safe sleeping for your baby. Much of it is commonsense, but the following guidelines should help: ? Always put your baby to sleep on their back. ? Use a firm mattress and never co-sleep on a waterbed or on a sofa. ? Do not use a pillow for your baby and always make sure that your baby's head is clear of your pillows and bedding. This will reduce the risk of smothering and overheating. ? Do not sleep with your baby if you smoke, have drunk alcohol or have taken any drugs which make you drowsy. ? Do not give your baby a pillow, and ensure that his head is not covered by the duvet or the sheets. Either of these could smother him. ? Use bedding that tightly fits the mattress and make sure there are no gaps between the bed and the headboard where they could become trapped. If you are unsure or need further advice, always speak to your GP or Health Visitor. Arabella Greatorex is the owner of http://www.naturalnursery.co.uk, an online store selling organic and fairly traded products of families.
Related News
|
 |
|
|
RELATED ARTICLES
Time Managment Skills for Children
Time management is an organisational concept traditionally associated with adults and the workplace. The experts tell us that more efficient use of time means greater productivity. So organisations encourage individuals to prioritise, plan ahead and make the most of the time that they have at work.
I Scream, You Scream, We All Scream, But Not For Ice Cream!
We all scream for ice cream. Or, we don't, at least not anymore.
Teenagers in America Today
"Family Matters" was the headline that caught my attention in the newspaper. That's the name of my radio program here in California's central valley. It was interesting enough for me to buy the paper and read the story. The article was about a recent study called The National Longitudinal Study on Adolescent Health, a survey of about 90,000 teenagers (age 12-18). The sub-headline was "Study debunks belief nothing works with teens."
Five Ways To Build Super-Strong Relationships With Your Children
One of the questions I ask in parenting presentations is "How do you show your children you love them?"
Dad, Go Ahead and Cry
She slipped her small, soft eight-year-old hand into mine. Her face was lit up with joy. And as my daughter took my hand and moved closer to me, I lost control of my emotions.
8 Tips To Save On Child Care Costs
Child care costs are are one of the most expensive costs associated with going back to work. Finding ways to cut down on child care costs without sacrificing quality child care is a top priority for all working parents. Here are a few ideas that can help trim your child care costs without sacrificing child care quality:
How to Create an Attitude of Cooperation
Having been a parent educator and a PBS consultant for Ready to Learn for many years, I have had the unique opportunity to work with Head Start families, Child Care Providers, and parents as well as schools, organizations, and teachers all over the world just like you.
Motivation - The Key to Your Childs Educational Success
For the first year or two of life outside the womb, our brains are in the most impressionable state they will ever be in. A baby's brain is immediately shaped by interacting with their environment. As a parent, one can have a large influence on their newborns first encounters with learning.
Coping with the Stress of Moving Home and Childrens Concerns
Moving house can be an emotional experience for adults, so imagine how much more unsettling it can be for children who don't really understand what's going on.
Defrazzle with Hug Therapy
"Hugging is healthy: it helps the body's immunity system, it keeps you healthier, it cures depression, it reduces stress, it induces sleep, it's invigorating, it's rejuvenating, it has no unpleasant side effects, and hugging is nothing less than a miracle drug"
Public Schools Can Waste 12 Years of Your Child?s Life
For over fifty years, public-school officials and politicians have tried one education fad after another. They have all failed. Children should not be turned into victims and educational guinea pigs by public-school authorities. Here's why public schools can waste 12 years of your children's lives and destroy their love of learning:
Your Big Yellow Bus
The big yellow school bus is coming down my road again. The neighborhood kids seem happy. The dogs are not. The kids are no longer around during the day and Jersey is going to drop a little weight without all the treats they have been bringing her this summer. I must admit that when I see the bus, I feel sorry for those poor suckers. And I express my gratitude that I'm no longer going back to school this time of year.
Second Letter to My Daughter
Dear Camille,
Parenting Your Teenager: Truth or Lie?
Attention all parents of teen-agers. Here is an important, groundbreaking and even shocking bulletin for you:
Pay Attention! Its Your Most Important Job
Anyone can become a parent; there are no tests or interviews to pass. Children can become parents, mentally disabled people ? it's even possible to become a parent while in a coma!
ADHD: Dialogue with a Non-Believer, Part Four
Dear Sir,
Just Average
What do you mean average? Not good? Just doing good enough?
Play the Ball, Not the Man!
As parents and teachers, sometimes we want to praise, at other times we need to rebuke. Either way, how do we put our point across with maximum effectiveness?
Parenting Problem? 5 Simple Things That Will Help
What is a parenting problem?
Time To Connect With Your Teen
While on a recent trip to the grocery store, I happened to hear a mother telling her teenage daughter not to answer her ringing cell phone. Of course, the daughter explained to her mother that "she just had to answer it" As the mother was in the middle of stating how she barely gets two minutes of her daughters time in a day, and her daughter answering the ever so "important" call anyways, all I could think was how much I could relate with this poor woman. In fact, I'm sure most parents with teenage children can relate to her as I did.
|
