Twelve Tips To Connect With Teachers At Conference Time
It's that time again! Parent-teacher conferences are coming. Are you nervous? Excited? Confused? It takes teamwork to raise kids. Teachers are part of the team, but sometimes it feels like you're on opposite sides of the fence. Connecting with teachers can help bring out the best in your kids. Here are twelve tips to make conference time a productive, team building experience. 1. Talk with your child before conferences. Ask: "What's the best thing and worst thing about school for you right now?" "What would be most helpful for me to know before meeting your teacher?" "How are you feeling about school, and what are you needing?" Listen more than you talk to draw out their thoughts. 2. Identify feelings and needs. Look at the situation with empathy for everyone's needs, (your child's, the teacher's, and your own.) This puts you in a better position to engage cooperation from all parties. 3. Be on time and end on time. You may want to linger to bask in the glory of your child's accomplishments, or stay to find resolution to additional issues. Rather than creating tension for the teacher and waiting parents, set up a follow-up phone call or meeting. 4. Solve problems by focusing on solutions. If you're dealing with an ongoing problem, follow these steps: a. Listen to the teachers concerns. b. Talk about your concerns. c. Together, come up with a list of ideas that would help to solve the problem. d. Agree on a plan of action. e. Set a specific date to evaluate progress or adjust the plan. If possible, include your child in the problem solving session. Kids enjoy following through on plans they help put in place. 5. Make specific requests, such as, "Would you be willing to move Ella's seat to the front row, so she can see the board more clearly?" It's easier for a teacher to be helpful, when you are specific about your child's needs. If your request is declined, discuss what other ways your child's needs can be met. The best solutions aren't always the first ones we come up with. 6. Communicate with respect to gain respect. Suppose you are angry over a teacher's actions. If you begin accusing, forcing, and condemning, you may or may not bully the teacher into complying, but you've lost either way. Be assertive, not aggressive. Instead of attacking the teacher, attack the problem. A mom shared this story with me. She said, "Ben's teacher made comments in front of the class, about his forgetfulness, including calling him 'the absentminded professor.' Ben was embarrassed and felt worse about himself and his ability to remember things every time she did it. At conferences I described the problem without attacking the teacher. I was relieved to see how eager his teacher was to be helpful. She even thanked me for bringing it to her attention. A few days later, Ben thanked me, saying things had gotten a lot better at school since conferences." 7. Take notes. Conferences can be frantic, especially in the higher grades when you meet with multiple teachers. It can be hard to keep it all straight. Jot down teacher contact information, and any suggestions. 8. Check your self esteem at the door. I waited in line to talk with my son's high school math teacher who said, "You son is a stellar student. That's all I have to say." I floated away from his table on a cloud. Next, I met the science teacher. She said, "Your son is disorganized, constantly late for class and behind in his project." I went from floating to sinking. I had to remind myself, "This isn't about me. It's about being helpful to my child." Keep your self-esteem high by not linking it to your child's performance. 9. Don't spiral down the tunnel of negativity. You'll suck the teacher down with you and your child will suffer. When you sit down at conferences, resist the urge to purge your complaints about your kid's poor manners and messy bedroom. Give the teacher insights into your child's passions or interests. What you focus on grows. While you need to be aware of negative behaviors, your energy is best spent focusing on what your child is doing right. Inspire faith, possibility, and the potential for growth. Improvement is a process. It doesn't happen all at once. Instead of expecting perfection, point your child in a positive direction, by focusing on what's going right. Encourage your child's teacher to do the same. 10. Teachers are people. When my youngest was in first grade, he used to think his teachers lived at the school. He thought their bedrooms were in the teacher's lounge. Sometimes parents also forget that teachers are real people, with their own personalities, temperaments and styles. Rather than criticizing one teacher for being less spontaneous or more reserved, than another, consider the value your child gains from learning to interact with each teacher's unique qualities. Look for the best in what a teacher has to offer, and you'll find it. 11. End the meeting by summing up what was said. Include any specific action steps you've agreed upon, and confirm any follow up that may be needed. Clarity relieves confusion. 12. Give appreciation. Teaching is a challenging job. After conferences write a letter or email specifically describing what you appreciate about the teacher. Your positive feedback is energizing and sets the tone for a more positive educational experience for your kids. Marilyn Suttle presents parenting and work/life communication keynotes and workshops for corporations and associations. To receive her FREE e-newsletter: Life in Balance: Thriving Kids/Thriving Parents, visit: www.SuttleOnline.NET, or reach her directly at 1-248-348-1023.
Related News
Parish needs more foster parents - Natchez Democrat
Parish needs more foster parentsNatchez Democrat, MS -14 minutes agoIn that same region, there are approximately 200 foster parents. In Concordia Parish, there are only 10 foster parents, but there are 30 foster children in ... |
Father to gallery: leave parenting to parents - Canada.com
Father to gallery: leave parenting to parentsCanada.com, Canada -Aug 25, 2008"I am appalled that an agency of the federal government would think it had the right to tell a parent how they can hold their child, that they are going to ... |
Amherst Center: Lessons for town in kids' allowance debate - Amherst Bulletin
What it takes to be a good parent in today’s culture - The Prairie Star
CW Shows This Fall have Coddled Kids - EntertainmentToday.net
CW Shows This Fall have Coddled KidsEntertainmentToday.net, CA -8 hours agoWe think this generation of parenting is different than the ones we grew up with. We, as parents, did almost everything that our kids are doing. ... |
Sarah Palin's Feminists for Life Membership Points to Pro-Woman ... - LifeNews.com
The Observer - Sarnia Observer
Man sentenced to 18 months for cat stabbing - WTHI
Struggles of single parenting - Waseca County News
Waseca County News |
Struggles of single parentingWaseca County News, MN -3 hours agoBjerklie’s parents, who live in Bjerklie’s hometown of Fergus Falls, Minn., have a tight-knit relationship with Hannah, and Bjerklie also has brothers who ... |
PBJ poll: Drink up, teens - Bizjournals.com
|
|
 |
|
|
RELATED ARTICLES
Mothers Day Tribute
As Mother's Day approaches I would like to give a different perspective to ponder.
God Dont Like Rich People
I will never forget the day that my daughter's sixth grade friend told me that. We had been discussing someone who had recently lost a fortune and had become very bitter as a result. She suddenly piped up with that all knowing scowl that only a twelve year old girl can truly master while proclaiming, "God don't like rich people!" She said it as if it was a mortal sin worthy of an eternity in hell. She immediately made a snap decision from that point forward to dislike the person we'd been talking about. I've met her dad. He's a nice enough guy and from what I can tell, he agrees with his daughter. They are very regular attendees at their church. I don't know what church they go to, but all I could think to myself at the time was, "Who in the world is teaching her that!?"
Top Ten Ways to Raise Emotionally Intelligent Kids
Having a high level of emotional intelligence in your children is the best way to ensure that they live a happy, successful, and responsible life as an adult. Here are ten ways to help your kids attain a high degree of emotional intelligence:
Breaking the Cycle of Emotional Blackmail
Family decision-making is an intriguing phenomenon. Many factors become part of the decision-making process. Emotions play an important part in this activity.
Parenting Your Teenager: How to Respond to Manipulation
Q. My daughter has gotten very good at manipulating us, and sometimes we do not even know it has happened until much later. How can we tell if we are being manipulated, and how can we stop it, or at least handle it better?
Empty Nest Syndrome
Paula's last child had just gone off to college and Paula was struggling with a deep inner emptiness. While she knew this day was coming, she was not really prepared for the intense hollowness that welled up within. After all, she had a life of her own. Her work as an occupational therapist, which she had gone back to after all her three children were in school, was fulfilling to her. She was fortunate in having been able to schedule her time to be home when her children came home from school so she could take them to their various activities. Paula had been a loving and devoted mother and was very proud of her children. She had been looking forward to this time for herself and her husband, but now that it was here, Paula felt lost.
Let Kids Help
One fantastic way to get your children involved in what they are eating, is to have them help. A great way to start is to let them make up their lunch for the next day. Obviously you will need to set some guidelines. For example, when I turned 9 I was allowed to make up my own lunch. In my girlfriends' houses they were 10 and in some others 11. However, we all felt very important and grown up that we were allowed to make up our own lunch. Again, my mom had certain guidelines. We had to pick a lunch meat, fruit or yogurt and bread to put it on (white, wheat, rye or a roll; today wraps are another alternative). As I got older however, I cut down to a half sandwich as I found I didn't always finish a full sandwich. I continue to eat lunch this way today, a half sandwich and some fruit.
Twelve Tips To Connect With Teachers At Conference Time
It's that time again! Parent-teacher conferences are coming. Are you nervous? Excited? Confused? It takes teamwork to raise kids. Teachers are part of the team, but sometimes it feels like you're on opposite sides of the fence. Connecting with teachers can help bring out the best in your kids. Here are twelve tips to make conference time a productive, team building experience.
ADHD Treatment: Strategy and Philosophy
If your child or teen has been diagnosed with Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder during the summer, or winter months, and if your child or teen is not a danger to himself or to someone else, we recommend that you try diet and nutritional interventions first and see if they work. Try our Eating Program/Diet and order the VAXA products "Attend" and "Extress". Use them for at least 60 days along with the Eating Program/Diet. It will take 30 to 45 days to really know whether or not this will be sufficient as an intervention. Give it time.
6 Tried & True Fun Ways to Educate and Entertain Your Preschooler
1. New Word of the Day
Is it ADHD or Bi-Polar Disorder?
Bi-Polar Disorder, or Manic Depression, is characterized by mood swings, sometimes extreme, ranging from depressed to normal moods, or from depressed to manic episodes. Manic behaviors are often very similar to "hyperactive" behaviors, including motor restlessness, irritability, temper outbursts, sleeping less, or having higher levels of energy. It is rare. But it does happen.
Summer Camp Care Packages
Every summer our daughter goes to summer camp. She looks forward
to it every year. I can't believe next summer will be her last
opportunity to go to camp before she goes off to college.
Theres a Lollipop on Your Bottom (and Other Terms of Endearment)
"I took care of Callie," my three-year-old announced.
7 Things To Teach Your Kids About Money
Did you know that many people retire broke?
Send Your Child to College FREE!
College is one of the largest expenses through the course of your child??s life. It is also one of the main causes of debt in America. With today's rates of inflation, it is very hard to save for an event that will occur eighteen years down the road. However, capitalistic America has provided many ways to send your child to college without paying a single red cent. Below you will discover just how easy it is to reach financial freedom.
Shopping with Children
Is your weekly shopping trip with the kids an absolute chore ! or are you happy to take them along?
Parenting Your Teenager: How to Build Trust
``Mom, can I go to the mall with my friend Jenny?''
Creating a Memorable Travel Journal Using A Stuffed Animal
You may remember The Red Couch Project, a book by artists Kevin Clarke and William Least Heat published in the 1980s documenting the travels of a red velvet couch across America.
Raising Kids on a Budget
There are only two ways to get more money:
The ADHD Parents Guide: Questions for the School
Here is something that you might want to keep if you are thinking about changing your child's school next fall or if you are planning to have your child tested by the school in the near future. Let me say this, if you are planning to have your child tested by your district, do not put off doing the paperwork. Sign them up today! Typically districts have 10 weeks in which to do assessments, but the clock doesn't start until you fill out the paperwork. This can be a long process, and if you delay at doing the paperwork you may not be able to get the assessment done until next year!
|
